Farting is a Necessary Virtue

Of all the things I wish I understood about my vertical sleeve gastrectomy (VSG), the level of pain/discomfort and pressure that gas you feel immediately after surgery is tops. 

It's so bad it took whole lot of people to convince me that the surgery really did go as well as the surgeon said. Now that I'm home and out of that pain, I'm not embarrassed to pass gas in front of anybody...which is funny because I've dramatically opposed doing so under normal circumstances since early childhood. 

Benjamin Franklin shared an idea of how to create something pleasing out of the obnoxious inevitability of passing gas; however, my perspective was completely changed by a belly full of co2 after surgery so science needn't go to many lengths.

I woke up in the recovery bay with so much pressure and pain in my chest, I feared a heart condition.  Reassurance came from several assistants and nurses whose explanations, when all strung together, helped me understand this pain was normal, it would take a little while to dissipate, they could give something for my discomfort, but it will all get better with walking once I'm "upstairs."

My abdomen was filled with carbon dioxide during surgery to create a larger work space in the abdominal cavity. I am SURE it's written somewhere in the pre-op paperwork and I am SURE it's one of those things gone over in the pre-surgical class, but I didn't comprehend the impact of having that expansion what.so.ever.

OW.

That air breathing thing they gave me to suck air into several times an hour? That caused the gas to be “pushed out” of the abdomen (as the lungs expand) so it helped disperse of some of it.
 
Walking helps the most to move it though - and I didn't care at all while walking the halls of my floor just farting away. Seriously. I felt joyous to finally rid of the discomfort. Even at home, I'd only slightly apologize for having to let one go because, well, it mattered more to me to let it than to be kind to others. 

 

Done with Pushing Reset

So for a last time I'm hitting the reset button on both diet and exercise. It's taken a shitload of convincing from several friends and colleagues, doctors and well-meaning family and now I've decided I will.

I'm scheduled for gastric sleeve surgery February 12th. I'm on a liver-shrinking/high protein diet aimed to throw my body into ketosis an make the laproscopy a breeze for the surgeon and his team. I started the 2 (premier protein) shakes/1 meal plan right away and have hardly strayed.

I say hardly because I did take in about 3 oz. of Frito's over two days. Thankfully, that's the extent of it. Otherwise, I'm eating lunches and drinking breakfasts and dinners.  I am without a proper exercise routine for the time being.

My intent is to get treadmill'ing ASAP and then rejoin SEAL Team PT training once I get the all clear from the Drs. to do rigorous training.

I'm looking forward to so many things. I can't list them now because I'm very sleepy. Being very sleepy so often is something I will not miss. :) Talk again soon. 

Xx,
Wendy

Do What You Have to Do.

"Your blog is total bullshit. You and your mother love the drama and stress. Jimmy was so bad to you. Yet you were never homeless or hungry. Stop blaming the [redacted] family for your problems. Your mother knew about and allowed any and all abuse you suffered. Shame on you for making your "story" everyone's business. If you need to talk about, see a psychiatrist! Don't contact my family again, ever."  My sister in law sent that (over Facebook) sometime in the past month.

I'm having trouble sleeping because my oldest step sister has stopped talking to me again. Just stopped cold. I'd thought it was strange and didn't expect it would happen again but it did.

I got that Facebook msg. and am pretty sure it's why.

My sister-in-law's msg. is in response to one of my previous blog posts (in which my family was disliked during an incident when I was 9) The incident was one that had a big impact on my emotional health and was/is obviously from a 9 year old's perspective. In the update I posted, I chose to view the incident differently and then, with help from my counselor, sought to learn how she (this particular step sibling who I was hoping to reconnect with) experienced -me- as a kid.

Maybe I was an intolerable pain in the ass. How would I know? But I haven't heard from her since attempting that...and I recently tried once more. That note from an angry sister-in-law is the only thing that can explain why.

What is there to say? Do? That isn't just going to perpetuate drama even more? Contrary to the idea that I love it, I'm doing very OK without it.  I'll sort my emotions out with professional help. Have done. Will continue to.

Meanwhile, here's to what is best for all involved.

I may still blog occasionally and I may still write personal things. Writing and blogging is how I sort stuff out. Nothing is of malice. I understand you have to do what you have to do. Fare thee well.

Sheesh!

Again. Yup. Day one on the Seinfeld Calendar for treadmill steps. What I need is a tiny Jen on the Edge in my pocket to remind me that one day missed isn't such a defeat that I should scrap it all. I would sit you on top of my bathroom mirror, Jen, up where the lights are.

With this blog post, I'm not going over where I went wrong. I'm just telling you I'm beginning again again with the prayer that it means ONE day I'll be able to say I began and I didn't stop for anything (not a missed day or a sickness, nothing). Hear me.