The Strange Changes

"Dear God, never again." It sounds like post-party anguish when you can't count how many shots of whiskey you put down, but are convinced you will not so much as look at whiskey again. That's how I felt by the end of the day of the Highland County Maple Festival.

I belong to a Real Foods group that meets once a month to discuss various topics and, occasionally, we attend regional events. So, I was kind of excited to go a few hours away to find real Virginia maple syrup and try....oh, everything.

Don't get ahead of me here. I AM eating low(er) carbs meals than I have done in the past. I DO know that real maple syrup translates to real sugar, real carbs; however, I felt prepared to go and try many different maple-infused items (just to see what they are like) and I could reason all of this to be OK because I had a plan:

Three of us went on the trip. If we bought one of pretty much everything and shared it between us then I would end up with a bite or two of this or that and be OK by the end of the day. It was a great idea that could help me keep from that godawful full of junk foods feeling one often gets at these events by the end of the day.

Also, I wanted to make time to see things: visit crafts booths, tour a sugar camp, walk around, be active.

That was the plan and it went splendidly until I began tasting things.

Maple-covered peanuts from Laurel Fork Sapsuckers

I ate two handfuls of maple-candy covered peanuts. They were delicious! I bought a bag and have since had a few more (like 8 or so) and then I gave the rest to my in-laws so I wouldn't finish them. There are some ingredients in this bag that I stay away from with my diet so it was good to pass the yum on to someone else.

Then someone at the sugar camp tour told me there was this other amazing camp that makes maple donuts and pretty much sells out every year. Off to Puffinbarger's Sugar Camp we went...in search of these.

Puffinbarger Sugar Camp's Maple Donut

This looks angelic, right? But it tasted like blah to me. Now before you go thinking they don't know how to make a donut....think again. The shop was packed with people coming out the door and it took nearly an hour to have this particular donut in hand. This donut felt strange in my mouth and tasted gluey and slightly maple-like. It wasn't the BAM! WOW! confection I'd been convinced it would be. But why? The other two Real Foods enthusiasts couldn't get enough of them. Me? I was turned off.

Hmmm.

So we went for lunch a little while later...and had fried fish sandwiches from a local trout farm.

From a little stand outside Virginia Trout Company

The trout was so so tasty, I felt like I could eat again! And I would just ten or fifteen minutes later. See, one of our members is a vegetarian and needed a lunch that wasn't trout. Off we went to see about the highly acclaimed buckwheat pancakes we heard so many other tourists talk about.

Buckwheat pancakes with Virginia maple syrup

By this point, I wasn't hungry for syrup OR pancakes but decided I would try just to say I did. I couldn't finish this half a pancake, but I did guzzle down a pint of milk. Guess I needed that. The pancakes tasted good to me - they remind me a lot of raisin bran cereal flakes. Is that the way they are supposed to taste? Got me! But they did and I liked them enough, but not enough to finish. Like the donut, I just wasn't getting much from this stuff. Could we go back for more trout?

We spent the day looking at so many things and really enjoyed the people and the atmosphere of the festival...and it was a beautiful, beautiful day to be in the mountains. On the way home, there was ice cream and I thought, hmmm... maybe we could get one and split it (still had the game plan I began with!) And we did.

Ice cream stand just beside Sugar Town Antiques

And I could take about four bites of it before it was too much. It tasted amazingly good - like a dream, really - and I couldn't go on. What was UP with me?

After thinking this over for several days, I conclude that my palate has changed considerably. It really has. I can only guess that eating low carb has had this affect because I craved real food the entire day. I wanted more of that trout. I wanted spinach. I wanted salad.

Let's look at this day through the eyes of Wendy 2011: That bag of covered peanuts? I'd have at least eaten half of it. Maple donut? Psh, I would make sure two, if not three, would be mine. Trout sandwich? EWR. That sounds gross.  OMG Pancakes! Yes, I will have two. And I would finish them. I'd feel so full, but I would finish them. And then ice cream? To each their own. I'd want the entire cup. And even if it meant driving and eating with it melting all over, I'd spoon and drive. On a full stomach, gorging on sugar, a pre-diabetic.

So when I sometimes think this low carbs thing is too slow or isn't working, it may be helpful to remember the Highland County Maple Festival because Wendy 2013 just couldn't take it. Thank God, right?!

Got My Walking Papers

That's right. I've been canned.

Well. My attitude has.

Before you go thinking I lost my job, I'll let you in on a fact known only to my close friends and nutritionist and counselor: I have struggled to get walking with any regularity. Despite mental efforts and emotional anguish, and external accountability (such as assuring a friend I would do the mud run this year) I have bypassed time on the treadmill for anything else I can think to fill time with.  I will even do things I don't necessarily like to do...just to avoid stepping on that never-ending belt.

Some of the trouble is a not-so-healthy attachment, a codependency, I still have for my mother who died last summer. Some of the trouble is an irrational fear I can't define - an actual intimidation which builds anxiety. Some of the trouble is my horribly defiant personality. My BFE, my nutritionist, my own thoughts, knowledge of my mom's plight, reminders of the mud run tell me I should get on that thing.  And she who does not like to be told what to do resists. RESISTS!

I believe there are no accidents in life, though there is pain and suffering, and before I tell you how I know my time has come....how I know my days of sedentary being are over...I have to introduce you to Carol Finch.

I met her once. Once was enough to spark an instant connection between the two of us (something I think Carol was able to create with many, many others). And knowing how frail she was from (eventually) several types of cancers seriously taking a toll on her, knowing I might never see her in person again, I signed up for her monthly email alerts where she'd give an update on her treatments and options and remind us all that even in the face of her hardships she was going to her job as much as she could and volunteering in the community which she loved. She went to yoga. She went to lung cancer awareness and fundraising events. She did not stop until Monday when she died.

Here is a glimpse through the eyes of someone she worked with.


"Carol redefined the term “community stewardship” as she freely gave her time and expertise to dozens of not-for-profit foot race events each year. My guess is that at her healthiest she helped run the results of 40 events on any given year. By my rough tabulation these events, thanks in great part to her wonderful leadership, raised over three million dollars for a variety of worthy community causes. Heck, even as recent as two weeks ago she was out helping at The Valentine’s 5K at Old Trail, which raised dollars for our local chapter of Amnesty International. In fact she was so determined to help to the very end, that she actually teleconferenced, from her hospital bed, advice to my daughter and other CTC volunteers, just this past Friday evening, as they registered folks for the MJ8K!"  

That was Carol. At work on Friday, at rest, in peace on Monday.

Then I got her email update for February...on Tuesday morning. Of course it couldn't be her, but my fingers raced to open and read whatever this had to say.


 "In Charlottesville, instead of a church service, we are planning have a gathering in celebration of Carol's life sometime in the next few weeks. Details to follow...


                               The Carol Finch Virtual Race
Walk, run, reminisce, and remember in celebration of Carol's life
Donations go to lung cancer research and can be giiven online or at registration.

We want each attendee to walk or run sometime in the weeks before the gathering. It doesn't have to be far—just a few yards is enough! Walk alone and remember; run in a group and reminisce as you go; run another race, … whatever. Just be ready to report a time and the distance. After all she recorded your times for decades.

 
At the gathering we will have recording stations, so that everyone can share a story of how Carol affected their lives. Then we can burn dvds and post the results online. The gathering will have: t-shirts, awards, grab bag prizes, food and drink."


Thank you, Carol (and her partner Coleman) for this gift. I can quiet my resistance, my fears, my unhealthy attachments and I can walk because I love you.