... I Learned from My Dogs.
The saying "to every season its turn" is staring me in the face tonight. You know I have been in a state of transition for awhile now. Years. Change, GOOD change, is taking place even when I can't feel it. I've had a tough time feeling or seeing any progress/good change since the summer full of suck.
But I'm being gentle to my spirit tonight because I've learned a lesson from my dogs. Two of my dogs are house-trained, well-integrated parts of my family. Two of my dogs haven't had a chance to be. The two who have been crated while indoors and running amok in the fenced yard while outdoors have been mostly segregated from us even though we love them, feed them, spend time with them, socialize with them.
We have been so busy and tired and bothered that we didn't work to get them acquainted with life outside the box (while indoors, mind.) They are very healthy, happy dogs and get lots of love and run time, they're just not sitting by us while we watch TV. I want to change that. I want them to be as part of us as the other two are.
But they've been boxed for so long and there are behavioral issues between the pairs of dogs to sort out and there's so much work to do, so much work, to get everybody to where we can be in peace together.
I hired a trainer today. It is such a relief to say that. I hired a trainer to show me how to be with all four of my dogs so we can be the family I hope in my heart we will be. It is going to be a long haul. It is going to take patience. It is somewhat overwhelming....or, okay really overwhelming....!! But I'm committed to this and to them.
My homework is to spend a few minutes a day, a few times a day, while they are indoors and ply them with bits of food to do fun things like come when they are called....and sit....and make eye contact...and calmly hang out with us.
I accept that it is going to take us and them a few months, if not more than that, to establish a relationship that is more than, "Hi, I love you, good dog, let's go outside. Good boy. Good girl! Yay, outside!" patting and rubbing and kisses. Exciting, yeah, but hardly fulfilling for me, and I'm guessing them, too.
So, I have patience for them and their training. ...and I suppose I can have a little for my own, too. This "read one book at a time, eat a healthy breakfast each morning, soon to work from home" practice I started for myself is going to take time, too.
Tonight, when I called Dru over, I was able to give her a treat and say YES! because she heard her name and, more and more, kept coming back. Spike got the hang of doing so after a good five minutes of trying to get his attention away from EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD. I don't even think he realized his name is Spike. It makes me sad/guilty that all this is so surreal to him...but I am committed. Yes. I am. To them and to me.
After an eternity, Spike finally learned he is called Spike and if he shows up when he hears that word he gets bits of food. And he learned that SPIKE! isn't a shortened way of saying "QUIT BARKING!"
Spike and Dru moved mountains with me today. I have to remember that my own small changes consist of getting over some pretty big hills, too. Even the ones I've climbed before and have to (sigh) climb again. And while I won't give myself kibble for it, I ought to give myself a YES!
And I am really grateful for Spike and Dru tonight. They prove that we can learn all new behavior. Even me.
